THE FOUR “PEACES” OF THE CROSS, Pt. 3

 Christopher’s Substack

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Pastor Chris White says to all of you: HELLO MY FRIENDS. May the Lord bless you today.

HOLA MIS AMIGOS. Que el Señor los bendiga.

“Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children. And walk in love, as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us, a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.”
—Ephesians 5:1–2

One of the great longings of the human heart is simple, but powerful: Do I matter?

Not am I useful, or am I impressive, or am I doing better than the people around me—but do I actually count for something? Strip life down to its essentials, and that question sits right at the center.

As we continue this series on The Four Peaces of the Cross, I want to explore a peace we don’t often name, but one that quietly shapes almost everything we do: validation.

A Quick Look Back

So far, we’ve considered two profound gifts the cross brings into our lives.

The first is shalom—not circumstantial calm, but wholeness. A peace rooted in a new heart, not favorable conditions. Jesus didn’t promise us smooth sailing; He promised us His peace.

The second is relief—relief from guilt. When God forgives, He does not leave residue behind. There is no lingering condemnation, no divine side-eye, no cosmic probation period. Forgiven really means forgiven.

Now we come to the third peace of the cross: validation.

The Deep Need to Matter

Validation means knowing that you are important. That your life carries weight. That your existence is not accidental or disposable.

When this sense of validation is present, it acts like emotional ballast—it steadies us. Many of us were blessed to receive this growing up. Our parents or caregivers celebrated our efforts, encouraged our dreams, and sent a clear message: You matter. You count.

That kind of affirmation builds confidence almost without us noticing it.

But not everyone had that experience.

Some of us grew up with a very different message—sometimes spoken outright, sometimes communicated through silence, comparison, or neglect. The message was subtle but persistent: You don’t quite measure up.

And once that message gets lodged in the heart, we usually respond in one of two ways. We either spend our lives exhausting ourselves trying to prove it wrong—or we give up and build an identity around failure. One looks productive, the other looks resigned, but both are stressful ways to live.

Neither brings peace.

The Cross Speaks a Better Word

Here’s where the cross does something astonishing.

It tells us—clearly, unmistakably—that we matter to God.

Not hypothetically. Not sentimentally. Practically. Costly.

The foundation for Paul’s call to love others in Ephesians 5 is not moral effort—it’s identity. Walk in love, he says, as Christ loved us and gave Himself up for us.

Why should we love each other? Because God has already declared our worth. If someone is of concern to God—and the cross says they are—then they must be of concern to us as well.

The cross is not God saying, “Try harder and maybe you’ll be valuable.”
It is God saying, “You were already valuable enough for My Son to give His life.”

That changes the conversation entirely.

From Servants to Friends

Jesus drives this truth even deeper when He says:

“Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends… No longer do I call you servants… but I have called you friends.” (John 15:13–15)

Friends.

Not employees. Not hired help. Not tolerated assistants. Friends.

And not only that—friends of the Son are welcomed as friends of the Father. That is staggering. That is validation at the highest possible level.

You are not validated because you finally got it right.
You are validated because Christ gave Himself for you.

Resting in What’s Already True

Here’s the quiet peace the cross brings: you no longer have to prove your worth.

You don’t have to outrun your past.
You don’t have to perform your way into significance.
You don’t have to define yourself by success—or failure.

You matter because God says you do.

And the best news of all? You are good enough—not because you finally became impressive—but because He lives in you.

That truth doesn’t inflate our ego; it settles our soul.

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